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[SSB] Gender General Cafe; for discussing gender stuff
Topic Started: Mar 23 2015, 09:20 PM (6,325 Views)
Saelnaha
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Let's just wait and see what happens.

my mother's birthday was on Thursday so I know how that goes, yeah
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gnik drazil
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The sun no longer sets me free
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Clawford
May 10 2015, 06:47 AM
Happy cisgender adult female day
Why are you such a bad person?
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Nell
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The Pretender
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Clawford
May 10 2015, 10:36 AM
You have a point but most of the features of the holiday are centered around traditional femininity that western society associates with cisgender women.
You say that, and yet Mother's Day is the day the Australian government decided to announce a cut to paid parental leave.
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Necare
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Fallen Angel

Terri
May 10 2015, 07:08 AM
And hey, you don't have to cis to be a mom! :3
Yes you do.

Also Nell, I [radio edit]ing can't.


:luna:
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Saturos
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heart-under-blade

Maybe not give birth, but I think Terri meant that, for example, they could adopt a child. That would make them a mother, wouldn't it?
Or in the case of somebody who had children and then transitioned; wouldn't that make them then a mom?

Anyway, I think dismissing it as only a cisgendered woman's day is pretty mean-spirited, even if that's what it actually was. There are all kinds of mothers, and mothers' day makes a lot of people happy, and it's always a day to treasure the relationship you have with one of your parents (or both of them, as the case might be). You never know how long you'll have them for.
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Momentime
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uh oh

right? i like how all of a sudden it's a bad thing to be cisgendered and a parent smh
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Ceremonial Dentist Fridge
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Spirit
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Necare
May 11 2015, 03:01 AM
Terri
May 10 2015, 07:08 AM
And hey, you don't have to cis to be a mom! :3
Yes you do.
No you don't! :3 Satty gave some good examples. Thanks Satty.

Nell, that's fascinating. Is there a big problem in Australia right now with parental leave? Is it being abused somehow?
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Nell
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The Pretender
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Not that I'm aware of. My understanding is that it's merely indicative of a government who has systematically cut funding to everything except mining operations and the acquisition of military planes.

Re Mother's Day: 1) Remember it's largely a commercial holiday; 2) it's just as much (if not more) about your relationship with your mother - which is a field that includes everyone - than it is about whether or not you yourself are a mother, cis or otherwise; 3) object to the cultural constructions of maternalism, not the sentiment (of celebrating motherhood) itself.

On a slightly related topic, a friend of mine pointed out to me that at least here, potentially, a birth certificate can be registered with two women as parents, because the fields to be filled in are "mother" and "partner", but there is no scope for two men to be registered as parents of the child.
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Saturos
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heart-under-blade

badabump

Came across this article about intersex, which linked to this fantastic post by someone who actually is intersex - it's an issue that doesn't get a whole lot of coverage all the time, despite, as the article pointed out, it being more common than albinism.

Anyway, interesting read! It definitely got me thinking about it, and what I'd do if my kids someday were born intersex.
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Sundancer
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Stargazer

Very interesting and important to note that intersex (afaik) is an empowering identity/term for plenty of intersex folks, but somehow the medical institutions have moved onto "DSD", so in terms of language it's interesting to see what's used in what contexts, for what reasons.

Also, regarding intersex individuals and people who believe in the binary strongly, I find it ridiculous and somewhat hilarious that they sometimes will refer to "science" as proving themselves correct in their ideas about the gender/sex binary. In terms of historical understandings of intersex, as mentioned in the article, people (doctors, most often, I suppose) used to identify babies' sex/gender through genitalia, but as medical technology has progressed, people have been categorized as intersex with configurations as varying as an extra chromosome (e.g. xxy) to physiological factors (hormone levels) to internal organs that would never have been known from an outside glance, to the typically held idea of genitalia that isn't neatly categorized (what is referred to as "ambiguous). Which is all to say that this only reinforces the diversity inherent to these matters and that the binary isn't clear at ALL; hell, people with genitalia that falls under commonly accepted sides of the binary still have massive variation.

David Reimer's case, though not that of a "typically" intersex individual, comes up a lot in conversations of coercive sex reassignment surgery (as opposed to gender confirmation surgeries some trans folks may get during their transitions, as fully consenting individuals) which are one of the key issues in intersex activism.

Also good and interesting to note that the author of that article discussed the inclusion of intersex in the LGBTQIA2S acronym. It's an important reminder that the acronym is a pretty big umbrella, and not everybody in the communities encompassed are understanding or kind to everybody else. The struggles intersex people may face when it comes to intimacy and relationships are just as present with non-cis non-straight people. And it's also a nice reminder that not all people in the spectrum have non-hetero orientations in some way; many intersex and trans people identify as straight, just as many don't. [/url]
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