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| Respect, logic, maturity etc. | |
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| Tweet Topic Started: May 22 2012, 01:11 PM (4,629 Views) | |
| The Commander | May 22 2012, 01:11 PM Post #1 |
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Kill Thalmor.
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A few topics that have made headlines recently has brought to my attention a glaring flaw in a number of people here. No names mentioned, but you know who you are. This flaw is screwing with everyone, yourselves included. This flaw is a circular logic of retaliation. And in my mind, it's an underlying problem that is causing EVERYONE here unnecessary headaches. In short, this flaw goes something like this: Person A messes with you in some fashion, perhaps it's screwing with your topics, perhaps it's screwing with your head, perhaps it's teasing you in a way that you don't like, perhaps it's showing you genuine disrespect. Whatever IT is, you turn RIGHT A-[radio edit]ING-ROUND and do something bad RIGHT BACK. And guess what? Person A FOLLOWS SUIT, and before long, a fight has broken out. In one of the aforesaid topics, someone said something about "being the bigger man". Well, that's a damn good piece of advice. If I call you a name, say a name that you specifically DO NOT want to be called, and you just let it pass, I look like the fool. I deserve the warning, the banhamma and the mod yelling. You get to sit there, snickering at your monitor as I walk away with a warn increase, and you get away free and clear. Furthermore, in the eyes of your peers, you look far more mature than I, and you get a little more respect out of your peers. But if you engage in the circular logic, we both look bad, and the mods probably won't give me a warning, because you decided to take matters into your hands and act like some elementary school kid and insult me right back. So, for the sake of EVERYONE here, INCLUDING YOURSELVES, drop this goddamn circular logic of retaliation AND GROW UP. It's not doing anyone any good. I don't care how much you hate the person calling you a name. We have ignore lists for a reason, people. USE THEM. Or, just ignore the insult. If they don't get a rise out of you, they won't do it. I learned this over a decade ago, and it works. If they don't get that rise out of you, that feeling of power over you when they make fun of you, call you a name, screw with your poll options or whatever in hell it might be, chances are, they'll stop. And if they don't, but you keep ignoring them? Then you have reason to go to the admins, and if the admins/mods are good about their job, and have the level of maturity I'd like to think they have, they'll put a stop to it regardless of who is dishing it out. |
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| Kula Diamond | May 22 2012, 01:25 PM Post #2 |
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atlus tracts
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12/10 would read again /generic |
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| Princess Emi | May 22 2012, 01:28 PM Post #3 |
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I'm the motherfactoring princess
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A+ post I agree with this though I haven't really bothered watching people fight so I'm not sure if it happens all too often here, but in any case it's still decent advice yo. even if you don't ALWAYS look like a better man every time you ignore insults... it's still better than public online fights. imo, anyway???? in any case people should do like I see slash doing and PM if they think another user has a problem with them. even though I have a feeling very little people are going to take this topic seriously, and ignore the entire point of the topic, which is something I know happens here and i just roll my eyes every time................ |
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| Mireia | May 22 2012, 01:35 PM Post #4 |
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Codename: Sailor T
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| The Commander | May 22 2012, 01:43 PM Post #5 |
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Kill Thalmor.
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Something else I'd like to toss out here: if ignoring them or reporting them doesn't seem to be going anywhere, then here's what I suggest: Sit down with the SoB and get to know them. Find out their Skype, their MSN, find a time in the S-Box, whatever. Just sit down, and get to know them. Fun fact: of the four people I talk with the most outside of ToK (Seccy, Callie, Draco and Tractor), I hated 3 of them. I DID NOT LIKE THEM. Flat out didn't like them. They rubbed off on me wrong, they annoyed me, something about them just rubbed me wrong. Guess what? I took this piece of advice and I don't hate any of them anymore. So if nothing is working, get to know the bastard. Get know this person who seems to enjoy tormenting your every waking moment. You may find that once you get to know them better, you won't mind them screwing with you nearly as much. |
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| Kiki | May 22 2012, 01:47 PM Post #6 |
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Kiki Martius Chantico
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Great thoughts, Amiti. Getting to know someone you hate is really, really hard, but the results can be awesome. Growing to respect people you hate can really challenge your views in a good way. |
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| Saturos | May 22 2012, 02:10 PM Post #7 |
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heart-under-blade
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Yeah, I agree with you completely, Amiti. This is the advice I usually give to people myself, and is what I tend to follow myself. Couldn't have said it better myself.
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| Thorion Martius Pele | May 22 2012, 02:24 PM Post #8 |
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Greatest of Kradenette Heroes
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I'm respectful, logical, mature, everything asked for. |
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| Kamui | May 22 2012, 02:30 PM Post #9 |
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*moves away from mic to jump*
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Recent posts lead me to think otherwise. I do agree with Amiti though. The report function exists for a reason. |
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| Thorion Martius Pele | May 22 2012, 03:08 PM Post #10 |
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Greatest of Kradenette Heroes
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Sorry, my attention was brought to something else so my previous post was cut short from a long paragraph to a mere sentence. I'll edit it later to the paragraph I originally intended later. |
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| Dreaming Sun | May 22 2012, 03:22 PM Post #11 |
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Agree with everything in this topic. And of course, there's the fact that if you are doing the same thing they did to you to get back at them... you're letting the person you hate decide your actions for you /o/ Fun. |
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| Hisui | May 22 2012, 03:29 PM Post #12 |
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Seccy "no fun allowed" Secundum
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What. OP for best post in the board awards [if we have that category]. |
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| Super Slash | May 22 2012, 04:01 PM Post #13 |
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Completely agree Amiti. I've had a few misunderstandings with Jackal for example, but I PMed him about it instead of making a scene out of it here. And I think I'm on good terms with him now. Talking solves everything (usually). |
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| Thorion Martius Pele | May 22 2012, 05:18 PM Post #14 |
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Greatest of Kradenette Heroes
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I'm sorry but you must have skipped over my second post, I'll get back to my first one when I have the time. |
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| leaf | May 22 2012, 05:44 PM Post #15 |
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Crimson Leaf Vermillion
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This can go the other way, too. Sometimes, when you get to know someone you wind up hating them even more. That said, this actually isn't bad advice. lol e-arguments |
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| Bane Martius Agni | May 22 2012, 05:58 PM Post #16 |
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Archon Agni, of Clan Martius
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For example, I hate leaf. <3 Leaf |
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| Hoofs | May 22 2012, 06:56 PM Post #17 |
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dess dess dess dess dess
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*clap* *clap* *clap* |
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| Seraphim | May 22 2012, 07:46 PM Post #18 |
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~Burning Upon My Pyre~
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Well said, Amiti. I'm all for everything you posted, and people need to stop judging books by their covers and get to know people before shouting their BS. >_>![]() I have no qualms giving Thorion a chance. |
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| Thorion Martius Pele | May 22 2012, 08:04 PM Post #19 |
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Greatest of Kradenette Heroes
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Uh, thanks but I find the picture kind of creepy. No offence. |
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| Dracobolt | May 22 2012, 08:08 PM Post #20 |
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Incorrigible
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Just smile and nod, dude. But I must say I agree with the points that have been raised, and I'm pleasantly surprised to see a topic like this not inciting people to further drama. I definitely approve of getting to know people who annoy you; sometimes you become good friends. It's happened to me with some of the Kradenettes here.
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