Temple of Kraden News:
| Greetings, heathen. Perhaps some fortuitous blessing of Kraden's grace hath led you to our humble Temple, or perhaps you are simply curious about this strange and wonderful cult. Should you be willing - and dare to hope - to achieve enlightenment, the door opens before you. Lo! Leave your old life behind! For once you step through, you become something more than just yourself. You become a Kradenette. Are you willing to make the rapturous plunge? Do you have what it takes? One of us! One of us! One of us! Already one of us? Make your presence known: |
| BEHOLD KRADEN HAS ABANDONED THEE | |
|---|---|
| Tweet Topic Started: Jan 10 2012, 10:23 PM (5,444 Views) | |
| Ian889 | Jan 14 2012, 03:38 PM Post #101 |
|
Death comes to all of those who oppose me.
![]()
|
Fair enough I won't violently rip Reita apart. |
![]() |
|
| Princess Emi | Jan 14 2012, 04:05 PM Post #102 |
![]()
I'm the motherfactoring princess
![]()
|
just don't touch ME, and I'll make myself be okay. just have to suck it up and move on. also... I'm not a guy... |
![]() |
|
| Gilgamesh | Jan 15 2012, 12:37 AM Post #103 |
![]()
solbowz Aurarius
![]()
|
Gilgamesh touches Reita. |
![]() |
|
| Shadow Milotic | Jan 15 2012, 12:51 AM Post #104 |
![]()
...
![]()
|
Shadow Milotic touches Reita.
|
![]() |
|
| b l o n d e b o n d | Jan 15 2012, 12:51 AM Post #105 |
![]()
Wombo Combo
![]()
|
I feel abandoned. |
![]() |
|
| Princess Emi | Jan 15 2012, 12:07 PM Post #106 |
![]()
I'm the motherfactoring princess
![]()
|
Princess Emi touches Boyd and Milo with a vengeance |
![]() |
|
| Mireia | Jan 15 2012, 12:13 PM Post #107 |
![]()
Codename: Sailor T
![]()
|
Mireia snuggles Callie. |
![]() |
|
| Princess Emi | Jan 15 2012, 12:15 PM Post #108 |
![]()
I'm the motherfactoring princess
![]()
|
Princess Emi snuggles Miranya |
![]() |
|
| Bane Martius Agni | Jan 15 2012, 12:21 PM Post #109 |
![]()
Archon Agni, of Clan Martius
![]()
|
Bane Martius Agni socializes DWoGS |
![]() |
|
| Shadow Milotic | Jan 16 2012, 12:22 AM Post #110 |
![]()
...
![]()
|
Shadow Milotic snuggles Reita and Mireia.
|
![]() |
|
| Bane Martius Agni | Jan 16 2012, 12:26 AM Post #111 |
![]()
Archon Agni, of Clan Martius
![]()
|
I want to be snuggled. =( |
![]() |
|
| Mireia | Jan 16 2012, 12:27 AM Post #112 |
![]()
Codename: Sailor T
![]()
|
Mireia snuggles Bane. Mireia opens her arms wide and takes everyone in for a gigantic group hug. Spoiler: click to toggle
|
![]() |
|
| Bane Martius Agni | Jan 16 2012, 12:30 AM Post #113 |
![]()
Archon Agni, of Clan Martius
![]()
|
Bane Martius Agni builds Mireia new, augmented arms that stretch. |
![]() |
|
| Mireia | Jan 16 2012, 12:37 AM Post #114 |
![]()
Codename: Sailor T
![]()
|
Go-Go Gadget Arms! Mireia hugs everyone successfully. Much better. You get extra snuggles, Bane. |
![]() |
|
| Bane Martius Agni | Jan 16 2012, 12:38 AM Post #115 |
![]()
Archon Agni, of Clan Martius
![]()
|
|
![]() |
|
| The Commander | Jan 22 2012, 12:15 AM Post #116 |
![]()
Kill Thalmor.
![]()
|
[rainbow]But no, I don't love you. I can't love you. You are a man. I cannot love you. I am incapable of falling in love with a man. It is as the essay says, the M-97 Viper is a rapid-firing sniper rifle available in Mass Effect 2. As a Sniper Rifle, it can only be used by Soldiers and Infiltrators. However, any class can use it should they choose to acquire Sniper Rifles in the advance weapon training on the Collector's Ship on their first playthrough. That being said, Browncoats are OK. Space Marines are cooler. I'm sorry, I digressed. What are we talking about? Oh yeah, man-love. The Viper is more powerful than the Mantis. While it does indeed do less damage per shot, it can do in 1/4 or 1/3 of a clip what a Mantis can do in 1/1 of a clip. That's pretty awesome. And if you hit the body on the first shots, then hit the head with the killing shot, your squad mates will comment on it the headshot. Anyways, KANE LIVES IN DEATH! I'm sorry, I digressed again, didn't I? What were we talking about? Oh yeah, Edward Longshanks. See, William Wallace is 7 feet tall and can consume the British with lightning bolts from his eyes, and shoot fire from his arse. Speaking of asses, I hope you washed yours today. It's gonna be kissed by a princess... Anyways, your mother is a hamster, and your father smelled of elderberries. The air speed velocity of an unladen swallow is equal to the air speed velocity of an unladen swallow, regardless if that swallow is African or European. I whipped the llama's ass the other day. It was most awesome. PEACE THROUGH POWER! I'm sorry, I digressed again, didn't I? What where we talking about? Oh yeah, South Park. Family Guy is a shitty show. Just horrible. You see, because Family Guy sucks, Kane is just that much more Awesome. Kane has died at least 3 times yet not really. He's just that awesome. Did I just digress again? I did, didn't I? I'm sorry, I really did digress again. What where we talking about? Who cares! If I am cut, do I not bleed? It would be a mistake to take me for a corpse, General. It really would. Anyways, Garm sucks. It can't compete with the Ninjas. Especially the hot female ones. Then again, few can compare with a hot girl. Hot girls are hot and amazing. Especially hot warrior women. They can kick ass. Just like I whipped the llama's ass. That llama didn't stand a chance. Neither did those badgers. They kept popping up, and I kept smacking them down. Garm really does suck. Trust me. Get the Master Sword. It's that much better of a weapon. Trust me. Once you get the Master Sword, go face down the first boss in the first dungeon. You'll destroy him. What, you didn't know you could do that? Sigh. You're hopeless. And I'm awesome. Anyways, what where we talking about? I digressed once again, didn't I? Discipline me, and I will destroy you just like I destroyed that llama. Yeah. Those llamas. They're damn good target practice for my lasers. Charge that son of a bitch up and let it rip. Who needs axes, when you've got laser? Fricken' Lasers. So cheap. Always tearing stuff up. Well, not always. See, I know of a place where Lasers actually suck. And I mean, SUCK. They suck so bad, you'd be stupid to use them. Afterall, they're the earliest weapon you get in Master of Orion. You start the game with them. There's WAAAY better. Anyways, what's up? WE'Z DAH ORKZ AND YOU IS NOT. WE'Z GONNA STOMP YOU FLAT CUZ GREEN IS BEST. WE'F GOT DA PROFFIT O DA WAAAGH!! WIF US AND YOU HUMIES GOT NUTTEN. ORKS IS NEVER BEATEN IN BATTLE, SEE. AND- *BLAM!* I'm sorry about that. Next time, keep the Orks away from the keyboard. You have my apologies. OY! Take that whip and those fuzzy handcuffs and shove them where the sun don't shine. There will be no disciplining here! *BLAM! BLAM! BLAM BLAM!* Stupid "masters". I AM the Master! Grovel! You can't kill the Messiah. Anyways, I digressed again, didn't I? I certainly do that a lot. Fruit Mentos are [radio edit]ing amazing. Just awesome. Awesome like HOT WOMEN. I've included a hot woman for your viewing pleasure. Here's a link. Don't be shy. Go on and click it. Anyways, the Geth Plasma Shotgun, or GPS for short, is a damn awesome gun. Yep. It sure is. I'm rambling on, I know, but whatever. Who cares? I bet Mr. Resetti does. Hell, I've probably put that little bastard to shame. I once got that [radio edit]er TWICE in a single battle. My god it was annoying. That guy is up there alongside the Nintendog and the Devil assist trophies for sheer annoyance. Did I digress again? I did, didn't I? Ah yes, "Garm" the supposed S-ranked ax allegedly waiting in Fire Emblem. We have dismissed that claim. Space is the final frontier. And these are the voyages of the starship Enterprise. Her continuing mission: to explore strange new worlds, to seek out new life and new civilizations, to boldly go where no one has gone before! For the Emperor! Bah, the Emperor is no god! He got drunk under the table by one of his own sons! How is that being a god? I mean seriously! What kind of a god ends up passed out under the table from too much alcohol while his son keeps on going!? Anyways, you must reach and find the Temple of Aaaaaaaaaauuuuuuughh... To continue your quest. But before that, you must face the Glaive Bunny. Good luck with that. And you don't have the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch. All you've got is an S-Ranked ax. Whose yo daddy now?! S-Ranked ax. HAH! My Hand Grenade is far more powerful than that! I'm sorry this took so long to type up, but I had to take a number two in the middle of it, so it took longer than it should have. You must construct additional pylons. Seriously, you need more pylons. Go build them as the balls are inert. Your body is not ready and cannot take it. MEHTAL BAWXES! I have them! You cannot take them away! My MEHTAL BAWXES will destroy your STEHEL REHN! Kraden-Beatrice is a fool. Everyone know that. A total and complete fool. MEHTAL BAWXES!!!! SPHESS MAHREENS! Yeah, yeah, we know. Garm is an S-ranked ax. Didn't I just tell you? The Kid is much better than that. I worry when he takes all those guns, but, he'll be alright. He's The Kid after all... He doesn't need any Touhou lolis to get the job done. Just a bad-ass narrator and a bunch of guns. Oh come, on that's just overkill! Taking the Calamity Cannon and the Mortar: O-V-E-R-K-I-L-L. I prefer the rifle and pistols myself. The gods ain't gonna help you. What, you thought they would? None but the brave will rise from the grave to see the Valkyries fly. Did I just digress again? Yes, yes I did. And oh look, the "master" is dead. No disciplining here. Take that, Tentacles. I win. FREEEEEEEEDOOOOOOOM! And then The Kid fell to his doom… I’m just foolin’. Maybe I am, maybe I’m not. Now, go away, or I will taunt you a second time.[/rainbow] |
![]() |
|
| The Commander | Jan 22 2012, 12:15 AM Post #117 |
![]()
Kill Thalmor.
![]()
|
[rainbow]Garm is the Sacred Twin black axe of Grado. Garm is S-Ranked, meaning a unit must have an S-Rank in axes to use it. Due to the fact that a unit can only one S-Rank, a, say, a Warrior must choose between S-Ranking Bows or S-Ranking Axes. However, I slightly lied. Lyon can S-Rank both Dark Magic and Staves. In Fire Emblem 6: Fuuin no Tsurugi, a unit can S-Rank all possible weapons it can use. Therefore, a FE6 unit, to be specific, a FE6 Paladin, the best of which is Zealot, could use Garm, Audhulma, and Vidofnir. I'm sorry, I slightly lied again. A FE6 unit could not use Fire Emblem 8: The Sacred Stones weapons. However, it can use FE6 weapons. Therefore, it can use the Armads, Durandal, and Malte. However, it can not use all three at once, unless the game has been significantly altered and the Paladin has three arms. But that's slightly off-topic, I digress. We are talking about FE8 because we are on the FE8 board. The possible wielders of Garm are, in order of appearance, Gilliam, Franz, Garcia, Ross, Kyle, Forde, Amelia, Duessel, Gerik, Dozla, Caellach, and Fado. Quite a large portion of FE8's cast can use Garm. However, many of these units can only use axes post-promotion, therefore increasing the difficulty of getting them an S-Rank in axes. It can be done easier, however, if you use the Devil Axe. The Devil Axe gives 8 times as much axe weapon experience as most other axes or most other weapons. However, the Devil Axe is very heavy and very innaccurate. Also, it can backfire and do damage to the user equal to the damage it would've done to the opponent. The Devil Axe is risky but it has a good potential benefit for the user. Garm gives a +5 bonus to Speed. This is good because many of the potential Garm wielders could benefit from the boost. In appearance of order, I mean order of appearance, they are Garcia, Ross, Kyle, Duessel, Dozla, Caellach and Fado. None of them have good Speed. The stereotypical axe user often lacks Speed. A notable exception to this is Dart from Fire Emblem 7: Rekka no Ken. Dart has an impressive Speed stat, so giving Dart the Garm axe would increase his Speed to make it quite high. I'm sorry, I slightly lied again. Please punish me in a kinky way. Back to what I was saying. Dart cannot use Garm, despite the fact that the only weapon type he can use, let alone S-Rank, is axes. Why, you ask? Garm does nto, I mean, not, exist in FE7. However, Basilikos does. Basilikos could be considered an inferior version of Garm. I'm sorry, but I am digressing from the point I am trying to make. Please reprimand me if I do this again. Garm is acquired upon completing Eirika's Chapter 15: Scorched Sand or Ephraim's Chapter 14: Father and Son. Interestingly, the son does not appear during the Chapter. I'm sorry, i, I mean I, slightly lied again. The son, Lyon, appears in conversation scenes before and after the main conflict in Father and Son. However, I am slightly digressing. Upon completion of said Chapter(s), Garm, along with Gleipnir, are added to the main character's inventory. However, something interesting happens when the main character's inventory is full. I am sorry, what happens isn't very interesting. Something truly interesting does happen when the main character's inventory and the Supply convoy is full. In the first instance, you will have to send two of the main character's items to Supply, and you will have to discard two of the main character's items in the latter circumstance. This creates the interesting paradox where the sacred relics of Grado can be simply discarded. This is interesting because such powerful items, two of the eight used to defeat the feared Demon King, are merely thrown away.I'm sorry, I slightly lied again. SMACK MY ASS BABY! DO IT NOW! Only seven of those items can be used against the Demon King. Latona, the Holy Staff of Rausten, cannot be used against the Demon King because it is a staff that heals all of your units except the one who uses it. However, it has little strategic use because getting one of your units to S-Rank Staves is worthless. I'm sorry, I digressed yet again. Please discipline me, Master.[/rainbow] |
![]() |
|
| Dark Wizard of Golden Sun | Jun 17 2012, 10:22 PM Post #118 |
![]()
Leader of the Quakera Tribe
![]()
|
"Ronald Reagan! Tear Down that Wall!" |
![]() |
|
| Thorion Martius Pele | Jun 17 2012, 10:27 PM Post #119 |
|
Greatest of Kradenette Heroes
![]()
|
What manner of blasphemy is this? |
![]() |
|
|
|
Jun 17 2012, 10:29 PM Post #120 |
|
Worthy
![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
|
This is sexy. |
![]() |
|
| Go to Next Page | |
| « Previous Topic · Feedback and Suggestions · Next Topic » |





















![]](http://z1.ifrm.com/static/1/pip_r.png)

3:16 AM Jul 11






